Archive for the 'Family' Category

No news is good news

Wow!  It has 2 months since I have done any kind of remotely comprehensive update.  I don’t know why it has been so hard to find time to blog.  I have to chalk it up to life gliding along in a really lovely normal way right now.  There is a certain ease that life with Aidan has fallen into and it is nothing short of beautiful. 

Brace yourself for the mother of all updates.  And I’m sure I will still forget some really cool stuff!

Aidan just finished up his school year and will be on break from his preschool for the summer.  These last few months have been amazing for him and I am so glad we decided to go ahead and get him going on preschool.  Pretty much all of the 16 kids in his “3’s” class are coming back next year to do the “4’s” class together.  The moms have organized summer outings once a week with the kids so they don’t miss each other too terribly.  He has made some really good friends there and his social skills are booming!

Painting with some of his preschool buddiesWelcome circle at preschool

The preschool  year finished up with some neat events including baby ducks hatching in the classroom (the 4’s class brings them on their overnight to Pioneer Farm and gives them to the farm…Aidan will get to do this next year).  The kids got to see the baby ducks swim each class day and they all got their turns holding the ducklings.

Watching the baby ducks swimCheck out what is nestled in this towel I'm holdingBeing very gentle with the baby duck

The kids also had a “Teddy Bear Picnic” on the last official day of class.  A few days later his class gathered at the Pea Patch at Mercer Community Center to plant their pumpkin starts.  In the fall they get to go up in October and pick the pumpkins they planted.  I LOVE the wonderful continuity these teachers bring to the children.  I couldn’t possibly have found a better place for my boy.  :-)

Listening to the story of the teddy bear picnicThe teddy bear was down here having a picnic...just like the storyPopping bubblesThe teddy bear gets a hugThe buddies are happy to see each otherAidan, Sophia and Gracie digging the holes for their pumpkin startsAidan and Mommy helping plant the preschool pumpkin patch for this fallDorian, Kieran, and Aidan sharing a snack and comparing early summer scrapes

We spent Memorial Day weekend with my brother and his family.  My brother’s kids are 12 (girl) and 9 (boy).  Aidan ADORES them and he always rises to the occasion around older kids.  I couldn’t believe all of the things Aidan learned to do over that weekend.  He built marble runs with cousin Gavin, played stomp rockets with cousin Morgan, learned to ride a scooter, took part in a water fight and got Daddy, and got his first bike!  This child is really coming into his own and figuring out how his body works.  It is nice to see him take chances and not be afraid to try new things.  It was a glorious weekend.  When I saw him riding his bike, I actually had tears come to my eyes. So many times I had really never dared to dream of this day.  A day when I wouldn’t be thinking of oxygen tanks, damaged lungs, and all of the other things that came with his prematurity.  I was just watching my little boy growing up before my eyes…racing a scooter down the street and fearlessly pedaling his very first bike.  It was almost surreal.  I basked in it.  It felt….good, right, and overdue.

Oh those baby blues..just like DadHaving fun with the rocket launcherLaunchingScooting toward my cousin MorganMom following me on the scooterDaddy showing me how to use a supersoakerDaddy getting me with the supersoakerPayback DaddyI caught on right awayI'm a happy boy

The weather in Seattle has also been almost too good to be true.  We had a couple of 95 degree days last week and I have been taking full advantage.  I think Aidan and I have fallen just short of living outside the last few weeks.  We have gone on outings to the zoo, out to new parks, out to the Town Center fountains, to a new splash park, many neighborhood parks, and gotten him his first supersoaker.

Love the 3.5 year old cheesy grin!Hi Dad!Watching the penguins at feeding timeNew Penguin exhibit at the zooThis is a fun piece of equipment!Part of the new climbing structures at Grass Lawn Park...not too sure about thisHe was a pro in no time!Aidan and his new friend Nathan enjoying the fountains...it was 96 degrees today!Got me!Walking Bela with the waist leash...I think I'm such a big boySwinging with ThomasThomas is my friendThe whale's blowhole is spraying me!I think I want to climb the big whale!Up on the big kahunaHe almost looks like he is surfing or somethingCan I do thisYup!The dragon is spraying me too!This was so much fun Mom!He's having fun with theseGonna get you Mommy!

His brain is growing every day too.  He is currently amazing me with how much his intellectual curiosity is ramping up.  He has started asking LOTS of questions.  Some examples recently range from “Mom, do you think it will rain today?”, “My favorite engine is Thomas, what is your favorite engine?”, “What does THAT sign say?”,  “Why is Daphne’s (our cat) tongue so much rougher than mine?”  It is amazing to see his mind start to function in different ways and start to show lots of curiosity about the world.

Oh…and thanks to Daddy, Aidan finally totally potty trained in the snap of a finger. They were out and about with underwear on and Aidan wanted a pull-up to do “#2″ in and they didn’t have one. So Aidan didn’t have much choice but to go on the potty. And once he did that, he was totally trained. He has also stayed dry overnight better than 90% of the time. Just goes to show you that with a lot of things, when your child is really ready then it will be easier to do it than when they aren’t.

I’m sure I’m forgetting a ton, but let’s just say life is GOOD. It’s better than good. It’s amazing and I swear I am the luckiest woman on the planet to get to be part of this wonderful life with my son and my husband. I am truly humbled and grateful.

To close out the post, what would summertime with a 3 year old be without his first real summer scrapes? (courtesy of the new bike)

Evidence of my first real bike scrapes

How to make Daddy get teary eyed

Aidan,

You have an amazing ability to bring out emotion in your father.  I wanted to write this down so that we never forget it.  One night last week when your Daddy came home from work, you ran to him smiling as you always do.  Then you said, “Welcome to home Daddy!”

Daddy scooped you up and gave you a huge hug and it was then that I spotted the evidence of the effect you have so often on him.  He was smiling and there was “sand in his eye.”  :-)

We love you little man.  You continue to delight and amaze us.

Here are some pictures from early festivities of Christmas 2008. You are so enchanted with everything that is going on. Understanding who Santa is, making cookies and gingerbread, going out in the snow….you are loving it all. The Christmas gift you are getting is so big that we really had to have you open part of it early. We are going to Portland to see family for Christmas and we can’t transport it all. Hint to those looking at pictures….what might go ON a brand new train table? :-) You already have a small Thomas starter set and you have asked Santa and Mommy and Dad for a big Thomas set. So we shall see my little man.

Here you are putting the table together with Daddy.

First part of my Christmas presentPutting together my train tableBuilding my first track on the new table

And here is our first attempt at a gingerbread house. We did pretty good!

Starting our first gingerbread houseDecorating the gingerbread manMe and mommy working on the gingerbread houseOur creationThat didn't last long!

I love seeing the magic of Christmas through your eyes, Aidan. Thank you for this most precious gift. This is my best Christmas ever.

Mommy got served

Have I mentioned that I think Aidan is pretty smart?  There are a ton of reasons, but at the top of the list lately is probably his sense of humor. 

Funny story…Saturday night the family walked down to the Mercer Island Fire Station for the annual Mercer Island Christmas tree lighting and community gathering.  They were going to light the tree in Mercerdale Park and the firefighters were going to be showing the trucks to kids.  Christmas goodies and hot drinks to be served.  Except…

That Mom got the night wrong!  Don’t ask me why on earth I thought the 5th was a Saturday and not a Friday.  But I blame it entirely on Mommybrain.  Does that give me a pass? :-)

On the way home, I suggested we stop at the Starbucks and get Aidan a hot chocolate.  We sat inside by the fire and he thoroughly enjoyed it.  During one sip, he began doing the swishing thing that kids like to do with drinks sometimes.  I told him politely to swallow it.  He smiled devilishly at me and kept swishing.  I said, “Aidan this is NOT a game!  Swallow it.”

He smiled again and Brandon told him to do what Mommy said.  So Aidan swallowed the cocoa and dealt out the following gem.

“Mommy, it IS a game.”  And he smiled ear to ear. 

Brandon looked at me and simply said, “Mommy, you got served!”

Even more cuteness

More shots from our photography session this weekend.  We brought his Curious George along since that has been his nighttime buddy for well over a year.  We thought it would be special to get some shots with Aidan and Curious George together.  Enjoy!

Me and my pal Curious GeorgeMommy and Daddy love meChecking out my fire engine shoesI look a lot like Daddy stillCan't believe he is only 3Mommy and I laughing at the photographerGetting his noseBrandon and LoriI love you GeorgeBig boy collage

Happy 3rd “Birthday”

For those of you not extremely familiar with all of the preemie lingo, today is Happy 3rd “Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda” Day for our amazing Aidan.  Today, November 23, is the day he was due to arrive 3 years ago.  Instead, he had already been alive for over 12 weeks.  I have our family pictures taken every year right around this time because it is sentimental for me.  It is a way of celebrating Aidan’s birthday on the day it should have been. 

I will take some time later on today to post some more of the beautiful photographs taken of us at our photo session this weekend, but for now here are a couple of pictures that make my eyes well up with amazement and gratitude. (The first is Aidan on his due date 3 years ago, and the second is Aidan today.)

We love you Aidan.  You are truly amazing.

Sacked out on dadOur little miracle

Overheard at the playground

I am painfully aware that I am far from a perfect parent, but I am always a little sad when I see a parent who doesn’t seem to know how to let loose and have fun with their child. Story upcoming. Let me set the stage.

We have had a great week here in Seattle as far as the weather goes.  It was in the high 70’s and it was perfect weather for sneaking in a few more glorious days outside at the park.  I went online and found some parks we had not yet been to in the area.  I get bored going to the same ones time after time.

We went to one park on Thursday afternoon and then different ones on Friday morning and then Friday evening when Brandon got home.  Aidan is in his element outside.  He loves to have the freedom to run freely.  He really seems to love the open space.  I have heard that children learn differently just from playing outside and I don’t doubt it a bit.

On Friday morning, we found a park with a sandbox.  Wow, does Aidan love sandboxes!  Here comes the thing I can’t believe I heard at a playground.

Mom to boy about 2 years old who is picking up bark and scooping sand with his hands, “Eww!!!  Don’t do that!  That is dirty!  Come over to the swings.”

Ummm…SERIOUSLY?   I had to exercise a lot of self restraint not to blurt out, “You do know you brought him to a playground, don’t you?”  Yikes.  I feel sorry for a kid who is not allowed to explore and get dirty when he is playing outside.  Isn’t that part of the point?

Here are some cute pictures from our recent outdoor adventures.

A peekaboo through a tunnel on the playground equipment.

Peekaboo at the playground

A really tall slide he LOVED.

On a REALLY big slide

I loved this picture because he was going back and forth on this little “bridge” several times letting both his hands graze the bars and listening to the musical noise he made while going across. I love watching children explore and learn like that.

Listening to the clanging noise the bars make

Showing Dad some of his climbing skills.

My climbing skills are good

Fun in the sandbox.

I love the sandbox!Drawing a road in the sand

He gets such grownup looks sometimes when he is thinking. Brandon captured this gem.

What should I do next

We ended the Friday of park outings with a trip to Red Robin. By the end, Aidan was resting on Brandon and telling me “I’m so tired.” I actually managed to tire him out! Pat me on the back! :-)

Tired after a long day out at the parks

A day out with Dad

I was feeling under the weather yesterday.  I think I got some remnants of Aidan’s illness and it all hit me overnight on Sunday and into yesterday.  I had a fever, chills, muscle aches, sore throat, and upset stomach.  This morning, it is all gone but the sore throat and some lingering fatigue.

My dear husband was there to help me.  He took a sick day at work and told me he was going to let me rest and try to beat whatever had hit me and he would spend the day with Aidan.  What a great hubby!  It was a gorgeous day here yesterday.  Sunny, not a cloud in the sky and highs in the upper 70’s. 

A couple of months ago I bought a membership to Woodland Park Zoo because Aidan is in love with going to the zoo right now.  Brandon hadn’t been to the zoo with Aidan since the summer of 2006. 

Dow Family 1st Trip to the zoo.JPGMe and mom at the zoo.JPG

Brandon decided that if he was going to hang out with his son and “play hooky” from work, then he might as well do something fun.  So he and Aidan took off for the zoo. 

Getting ready to go the zoo with my Daddy

They had a wonderful time…as evidenced by the great pictures and my son’s nonstop descriptions of everything they did. 

Aidan and I have somehow always missed the giraffe’s feeding time.  For about an hour each morning, you can pay $5 to go up to an elevated platform and feed the giraffes leaves.  Aidan could NOT stop talking about this.  Brandon said he was not at all scared and was in fact smiling from ear to ear and giggling as the giraffe’s long tongue would wrap around his fingers and take the leaves.

Are we allowed up here DaddyFeeding the giraffe

Brandon came in around 1:30 or so with Aidan passed out on him and laid him down for his nap.  Then Brandon came in and excitedly told me about everything they had done and how Aidan knew the name and noise for every animal they saw.  Then he told me about Aidan climbing up a spiral ladder inside a play area of the zoo called Zoomanium.  Brandon said Aidan took off, and he went running after him certain that the ladder would be too difficult for a child under 3.  But Aidan did it all by himself.  He came whizzing down the slide saying “I did it” and he was so proud of himself.  It was then that I noticed my husband had a tear of pride in the corner of his eye.  My husband is the best.  I got teary eyed too.  Aidan woke up a couple of hours later filled with stories about the day. 

What a great sick day.  :-)

Maracas and drums!I love the carousel!

Is it obvious he had fun?

I had the best day!Me and my Daddy with the elephantSo cute in his little monkey hat

And lastly, a lovely picture of him quietly taking it all in.

Taking it all in

Just breathe

I have never felt this invested in a complete stranger before.  Tricia is going into surgery to get her new lungs.  I wrote about Nate and Tricia a couple of months ago here.  Tricia has CF and was about to be put on the transplant list last fall.  Then she found out that the baby she and Nate had been trying for was growing in her womb.  They made the decision to continue the pregnancy.  Tricia made it through a very difficult pregnancy with Gwyneth.  One that was treacherous for both her health and the health of her darling daughter.  Tricia made it to 25 weeks gestation with Gwyneth and bought her the chance at life.  Now Tricia waits for her new lungs.

Their beautiful daughter Gwyneth touched me as all premature babies do.  But this story Nate and Tricia are playing out before a faceless audience of well-wishers has me more captivated than I have ever been in people I have not met, do not know, probably never will meet.

Please take a moment to go to Nathan’s blog and leave a message of support.

If you haven’t been there yet, read their story.  It will amaze you.

I can’t wait to hear the news that Tricia is breathing with a new set of lungs.  I am on pins and needles.

The day we found out

3 years ago today we found out about you.  We talked about you for years before we dared to try for you.  We worked hard at our jobs and built a house to make a great life for you.  We spent a few years just being husband and wife knowing that your arrival would change everything.  In the fall of 2004 we began planning for you in earnest.  I visited doctors to make sure my body was ready for you. 

We started trying for you in January of 2005.  The doctor warned us it may take us a while because I had been on the pill for a long time.  We were excited and nervous at the same time.  In February I was a couple of days late and took a home pregnancy test.  It was negative.  I felt sad and yet relieved.  In March I was a couple of days late again and took another test.  Negative again.  It seemed the doctor was right.  This might take us a little while.  Two mornings later, I was still late. 

So the morning of March 17, 2005 I walked sleepily to the bathroom when I awoke.  I remembered that I should take another test.  I put the stick up on the window ledge and went out into the bathroom to brush my teeth.  I went back in to get the test, fully expecting only 1 pink line.  TWO?!?!  I rubbed my eyes and looked again.  I was smiling and shaking.  I walked into the bedroom to see Brandon half awake rubbing his eyes.  I must have looked shaken because he asked me what was wrong.  On the way over to him I was shaking so bad I almost dropped the test stick.  I handed it to him nervously.  He looked at me and said, “Ok.  So two pink lines means pregnant or not pregnant?”  (Wow…do guys really not know this? :-) )

I asked, “So you see two lines?  I am not out of my mind?”  He nodded and smiled.  We were having a baby!  We embraced for the longest time.  He grabbed my hand and pulled me back into bed.  “We’re gonna be late to work today,” he said.  “I just want us to soak this all in and remember this moment.”

We laid in bed cuddled up together for a good long while just basking in our love and the wonder of the journey we were beginning.

Aidan, we have loved you from the moment we knew about you.  We began our journey as parents that day.  Thank you for the most amazing, love-filled 3 years of our lives.  Thank you for the tremendous gift of being our son. 

We are pregnant!Climbing the stairs by myselfGoing down the slideLike being on a balance beam

The evolution of love

I feel I must issue a warning….this post of long and full of sappy sentiment.  But I really wanted to get it “written” down and I thought I’d share it with you.  I know many of you who read my blog have been down a difficult parenting journey and that it is easy to take our partner for granted.  It is easy sometimes not to see that the love in our relationship has not withered, but rather changed and become enriched.  So, if you feel so inclined, feel free to read on.  I wrote this mostly as a way of thanking my husband for all he does.

I’ve been thinking about how our definition of love changes as we get older and our relationship with our partner matures.  Brandon and I met in November of 1999.  Our first Valentine’s Day together was in 2000.  We were already crazy for each other and discussing marriage.  Brandon planned a lovely series of events to commemorate our first V Day.  I arrived home in my apartment after a business trip, dog-tired from an east coast-west coast non-stop flight.  A huge bouquet of roses greeted with a card and instructions not to make any plans for the Valentine’s weekend.

Brandon took me up to a lovely bed and breakfast that weekend. We snowboarded, had lingering breakfasts and dinners, and he showed himself to be a very romantic soul. I love this man. I love the man that planned romantic dinners and getaways. I love the man who was involved in everything. It seemed that every night there was something happening. Whether it was playing in a basketball league, cooking dinner together, meeting friends out, etc, we were always doing something. I love the man who would surprise me each and every year on V Day with something I didn’t expect.

don's bdayAt the ballgamewaileagolfcourseB & L HaleakalaB & L parasailing gearStanding By Carriage

In February 2004, I was feeling dejected about a trip to Italy that we were planning for that July.  I had been planning on using some frequent flier miles for our tickets to allow us to have the cash we had put aside over the winter for all of the other trip expenses.  I had not really planned ahead far enough for the flights and all the reward seats were full.  I just knew that we didn’t have the money to pay for the tickets and all of the other expenses.  I arrived home on V Day 2004 to a lovely card and a letter he had written about the kind of wife I was.  In it he thanked me for how well I take care of myself and for putting my body into amazing shape to carry the baby we would be planning to start trying for later that year.  He talked about having balance in life.  That it is important to save, to plan, and to spend wisely.  He said it is also important to grab some of life’s moments when you have the chance.  The letter went on to read that soon we would have a curious toddler running around the house and our chance to go to Italy on our own was now or years away.  He didn’t want to wait 20 years to hold my hand as we walked through the Roman ruins or to kiss me on a gondola in Venice.  He wanted to create those memories now.  The letter instructed me to look under our DVD player.  In an envelope under the DVD player was an envelope with enough cash to buy our tickets.  He had cashed in a small amount of stock and decided he wanted this trip for me and for us. 

Brandon in RomeUs in Rome

Us on a bridge in VeniceKissing on a gondola

These are just a few examples of the reasons I fell in love with my husband.  And all of those reasons are important.  But love grows, changes, and deepens.  The true measure of the man I married has really been revealed in the last 2 1/2 years.

We had the pregnancy that started great and ended with an extremely premature baby.  We endured a 15 week NICU stay that was trying in every way possible.

On the day I was released from the hospital (5 days after Aidan’s birth–I was fairly sick and needed a few extra days of monitoring) my post-partum hormones were in full surge.  I knew I was leaving the hospital without my baby and Aidan’s condition (while it has stabilized) was still tenuous.  We had a wonderful primary nurse that arranged for me to hold Aidan for the first time that day.  I will never forget it. 

As we drove away from the hospital later that day I was feeling beaten.  My body felt beaten and my soul felt beaten.  We were driving home without our baby.  This was certainly not how I had planned it.  Everyone’s dream is to come home with their bundle of joy, greeted with bouquets and gifts from well-wishers, and revel in being new parents home with their beautiful baby.  What was there to celebrate about this day for me I wondered.  The answer I came up with was nothing.  What on earth had I done that was worthy of celebration?

I was overcome with emotion when Brandon drove around the first curve into our neighborhood and there it was.  A neighbor had helped him completely deck out the front yard in celebration of the arrival of Aidan.  I was stunned.  I am sure more than one passerby stopped in their tracks (and maybe even backed up to have a second look) when they read the birthweight on that sign.  But that didn’t matter to me.  Somebody (the most important somebody—my husband) was announcing his pride and joy to the world.  He showed me true love at that moment.  I felt like an immense failure, yet he wanted to show me that all I had done to get Aidan to be viable and strong was something he was proud of. 

Aidan has arrived!It's a boy!

On Valentine’s Day 2006, Aidan had been home for about 2 months.  I had done a lot of soul searching about the issue of returning to work.  The conclusion I had come to internally was that I desperately didn’t want to.  On that night, I finally shared with Brandon that I didn’t want to put Aidan in anyone else’s care.  That I thought with his early start that he needed me.  (Not very fair of me to decide to broach this on V Day, huh?  :-) )  I explained the ideas I had come up with to supplement our income while we transitioned to bringing in less money.  The major one involved me cashing in the stock options from the company I worked for.  To my surprise, he said yes.  He said that all my reasons were good ones and that if it was that important to me we needed to try to do it.  He expressed that part of a good partner’s job is to try to help your partner achieve their goals and dreams.  

Brandon never planned to have a SAHM for a wife.  Heck, I never planned it.  I always thought I wouldn’t be good at it, wouldn’t like it.  Brandon has made numerous financial sacrifices along the way, paring back activities such as golfing in order to help us make our budget.  He went back to a very harsh work environment in February of 2006 because it was important to keep me home.  Later that spring, he found a job he was excited about and it came with a raise. 

My husband thinks it is very important for me to have a break, so he always makes time to get me out of the house by myself once a week.  He gladly takes Aidan for the day and they have a grand time together while I unwind and refocus. 

My husband works hard.  When he arrives in the door at 6 from a long day, I know he would love to just go  put his feet up.  He never does.  Ever.  I am sure a bigger part of him would love to be doing what we used to do after work…activities, dinners, sports, etc.  Instead he walks through the door, plants a kiss on me, and scoops Aidan up into his arms with tons of hugs and kisses.  He devotes the next 2 hours to our family.  He entertains Aidan (who has missed him all day) while I put the finishing touches on dinner.  Most nights he takes Aidan duty during dinner…helping Aidan get his food cut up, etc so I can have a break from doing that and enjoy a hot dinner.  He never complains about this.  He takes turns with me every other night reading Aidan bedtime stories and getting him settled into bed.  I admit to many times turning up the monitor just a bit so I can hear the two of them.  Brandon making Aidan giggle and vice versa.  The two of them talking and sharing stories.  Brandon giving Aidan kisses and whispering how much he loves him. 

At least once on the weekend, Brandon wakes up with Aidan and tries to get me some extra rest.  Many times he will be the one to respond in the middle of the night if Aidan needs us.

 The boys are passed out together

THIS is the stuff that men are made of.  This is love.  Not that I don’t love the romance.  I still do.  And Brandon still finds lots of ways to be romantic, but it is tougher once the kids arrive.  The word spontaneous all but ceases to exist.  In truth, romance is so much easier than the daily affirmations of love that my husband performs each and every day of our lives.  I am sure there are times people have thought I don’t deserve him, myself included. 

Deserving or not, I am grateful.  I got lucky.  Sure I chose carefully.  I chose a good looking, athletic, fun-loving, romantic guy.  I got so much more.  So much that is important that is not always on the checklist.  Brandon is loyal, optimistic, supportive, hard working, and most importantly completely in love with his wife and child.  He deeply loves his family and everything he does is part of the bigger plan for our happiness as a family.

The whole family outside Safeco FieldHeading out to Tosoni's restaurantThe family down at the Kirkland waterfrontDad loves Mom

But I definitely got lucky.  I am lucky.

Happy Valentine’s Day Brandon.  I love and appreciate you more than you could know.